I Didn’t Know it Would Hurt

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Lo is an chaco-wearing adventure lover who is actively involved in her local Chi Alpha. She has a heart after God and loves finding His presence all over the world.

LoBlogAs I got out of my chair to dance, I knew I was going to choose to completely abandon all insecurities and snap my fingers for as long as I could.

The lingering smell of cigarette smoke on my jacket had finally worn off and there was a sweet after taste of Turkish coffee on my breath.

Our local guides for the night had led us to the most popular café in town and were determined to teach us to dance ‘Silk Road style.’ I wondered how we would have any opportunities for deep conversation in this loud environment.

Halfway through our time at the café, the girls asked me to go to the bathroom with them. Not a huge fan of the ‘squatty potty’ myself, I figured I’d just go along to be nice. They proceeded to ask my about the boys in my group (usual bathroom conversation for girls), but as soon as I pulled up my sleeves to wash my hands and my tattoo peeked out, an opportunity arose.

Sharing What Matters Most

It was as if the Lord had dropped the perfect conversation right in my lap. Not only did I get to share about Jesus, but also how much He means to me. The power of strategically placed body art: God uses it all. As I shared my testimony, I strained to look for any signs of absorption. The girls were expertly masked. As if on autopilot, my mouth spoke the ins and outs of each symbol, while my brain was praying for softened hearts and open ears.

The end of the night rolled around and I went to bed with a burdened heart, but hope that tomorrow would bring a wider opening of the door.

The next day was full of answered prayers. Our new friends willingly asked questions about prayer, fasting, and what Jesus meant to us. As we headed from a long day of talking, picnicking and hiking, I began to feel a connection with these new friends. I would call them brothers and sisters- I loved them. And if all we had done wasn’t enough- add a national rival soccer game to spark a little family competition.

The Moment of Goodbye

Three hours, two candy bars, and one cup of tea later, we were all crowded outside saying our goodbyes. This was the moment I was not ready for. There was so much more that could be done- how could I walk away not knowing if I would ever see them again? We didn’t have the hope of eternity together yet.

My heart broke as we hugged goodbye for the last time, and all I could do was hold onto the promise that God cares for them more than I could ever imagine.

As I walked back to the hotel, I determined to allow this sense of lost penetrate my heart; for then I could intercede out of true understanding and brokenness. God has given me the opportunity to cry out for each of these new friends by name, and through those connections, truly harbor a love for this country. My heart has been broken for Muslims in a way I didn’t think was possible. And as I put on the bracelet my new Muslim friend had given me, I swell of hope rose up in my heart that I would one day see her again.

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